Today kicked off early—way earlier than my body prefers—but I had business in Chesterfield, South Carolina. I was there to take my Rhode Island auto appraiser’s exam (don’t ask why that happens in South Carolina—I’ve stopped questioning this system). I wasn’t allowed to bring my phone into the testing center, which was a shame because the place was a time capsule. It looked like your middle school guidance counselor’s office, complete with motivational posters straight out of the Reagan years. I swear I saw the classic “Hang in There” cat still gripping that rope like it was 1987. The test? Easiest one so far—just 40 questions. I passed it quick and collected another official-looking piece of paper with my name and yet another DMV-style headshot that looked like someone just told me I was getting drafted into the potato army. Fingerprinting & Mr. July Returns From there, I had to get fingerprinted. No ink anymore—they just roll your fingers on a digital scanner. The woman checke...